The Art of Leadership By Dag Heward-Mills
A leader must be a master at avoiding conflict and confrontation – until it is necessary. The Bible encourages us to be wise as serpents so let us glean from the wisdom of serpents. Snakes are masters at avoiding conflict and confrontation. When they cannot avoid confrontation, they attack. Probably, you have found a snake in your house before. That snake would have been there for years. It would have lived there peacefully with human beings, even though human beings hate snakes with a passion. It is important, as a leader, that you develop the art of living peacefully with the different groups of people in your world.
- A leader who is wise as a serpent will live peaceably with his brothers and sisters.
Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.
Matthew 5:24
Jesus insists that you must be reconciled to your brothers before you worship Him. That is a basic Christian requirement. Some families are always having one conflict or another. If you are a Christian, it is important that you distance yourself from conflicts that get nowhere. It is important to rise up and display your maturity by refusing to live in conflict with anybody. Remember that a condition for God to accept your sacrifice is for you to make peace with your brethren!
- A leader who is wise as a serpent will live peaceably with his spouse.
Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.
Ecclesiastes 9:9
How can you live joyfully with your wife if you are always quarrelling with her? Perhaps you are not as wise as a serpent that is why you live in conflict for long periods of time. Do not let the sun go down on your anger! End your quarrel by 5.30pm.
It is important to measure the level of peace you enjoy with your spouse. Some marriages are constantly in conflict. Unfortunately, some couples are terribly mismatched and so constantly live in discord.
Some men cannot help but point out more and more faults in their wives. They are unable to overlook the smallest mistakes and constantly see themselves as school teachers sent to correct and train their woman. This kind of thinking leads to perpetual conflict as the spouse does not see herself as a student in a school. Some men are in conflict with their wives because they compare her with better looking options around. They therefore manifest their discontentment by finding fault with their wives. Whatever the reason, you must see constant conflict as a dangerous sign in your life. Even when there are in serious disagreements, it is possible to live peacefully with your spouse.
Another unfortunate cause of marital conflict is when the couple try to do everything together. God did not make couples into Siamese twins. Siamese twins are linked together at every moment and every second of their lives. Siamese twins are some of the most miserable beings on earth because they never have a moment of independence or privacy. Siamese twins are known to prefer death to their continued existence together.
When I got married, I wanted to do everything with my wife and I found that it created a lot of conflict. I became happier when I allowed her to be herself and I allowed myself to be myself. Try doing things as individuals, just as you did before you got married and you may have more joy and peace.
- A leader who is wise as a serpent will live peacefully with all men.
Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, LIVE PEACEABLY WITH ALL MEN.
Romans 12:17-18
Make it your aim to live peacefully with all the people God brings into your life. If you are a leader of a corporate organisation, you can learn to live peacefully with your competitors. Live peacefully with the government! Live peacefully with the opposition party! Live peacefully with your neighbours! Live peaceably with the church!
All through the bible the scriptures encourage us to live peacefully and quietly with all men. You cannot do much for God if you do not know how to make peace and live in peace. It’s time to learn from the serpent how to live peacefully with the very people who want to kill you. “And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace” (James 3:18). May you bear great fruit as you try to avoid unnecessary conflicts!
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